Who Moved My "HUNNY" Pot?
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| Photo: PartyTimesRUs.com |
When I was younger, I adored craft projects....drawing, painting, creating masterpieces of childhood imagination. I penned poetry and avidly wrote fictional stories. Then gradually, the arts projects, poetry, and writing stopped. Where did the creativity go? Who moved my HUNNY pot?
It's true that over the years, we become so involved in the daily hum-drum of life, that we oftentimes don't eke out or have the energy for our creative exploits. Which is very much true in my life too, but in my case, there was a fear that accompanied picking it back up.
What was this dampening fear? I scanned my psyche to figure out what was hindering the unleashing of my creative creature? And so began my quest.
Three "AHA" Moments
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| Photo: MomLogic |
Ironically, since I was a wee one, my mom's nickname for me has been "Pooh", so it seemed rather fitting that I was now in search of my "HUNNY" pot.
AHA #1: I soon realized that my number one fear, was the fear of FAILING. Failing to produce something worthy. But what didn't dawn on me is that it didn't have to be worthy of anyone else but me. AHA! First realization! Don't fear failing...failures lead to successes.
AHA #2: Second light bulb, and something that I still struggle with, is that I'm a perfectionist to my very core. For those of you that are artists, you realize that oftentimes some of the most remarkable pieces of artwork or creative pursuits result from the mistakes or imperfections. AHA number 2! I was getting upset because whatever I did wasn't "perfect". Not necessary! Especially if I'm doing it for ME! It doesn't have to be perfect.
AHA #3: The third realization had me digging back deep into my childhood as to why I felt the fear and perfectionism. Who was I comparing myself to? It was then I realized I was comparing myself and feeling overshadowed by my highly creative and accomplished mother. She is a very talented writer, artist, illustrator, and overall an incredibly imaginative being. In my mind I felt and often questioned the pursuit with, "Why bother?" There's no way in hell I can compete with that. I mean, SERIOUSLY!
Now trust me, this was through no fault of my mom's. She was being who she was meant to be. This was truly my own perception. Granted, she liked to tweak work that I had done which also created a subset of issues, but overall it was my feeling of inadequacy compared to her greatness. AHA number 3! It was then I realized that the only person that I needed to compare myself with was myself, not my mother, Ansel Adams, Degas....anyone! Truly, it didn't matter if my mom, or any of the greats, were better at it, I wasn't doing it for her, I was doing it for me...to feed MY soul. Avoid comparing yourself to others.
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| Photo: Richard Heeks |
So, in the past year and a half, I began painting on wine glasses and creating my own little art, which has been thoroughly satisfying, but also very addicting. Once I caught the bug, I wanted to do more and burst out of this shell I had created around myself. I began experimenting with other mediums and arenas and haven't had the FEAR hold me back from experimenting.
Now let me just say, there are times when I begin to get upset if something fails, or if it's not "perfect"...but then I correct my thoughts and tell myself, it truly wasn't a failure because I learned a new way of not doing it and making it better the next time.
Remember when pushing through some of your fears:
- Don't be afraid to fail.
- It doesn't have to be perfect, just try!
- Don't compete or compare your accomplishments with anyone else, but yourself.
~Fearless@40
